i don't know why. but i always listen to my older brother no matter what he says. not necessarily that i'll follow his advice, but somehow it matters. even when he talks as if he's the only one who matters in the world, not caring about others attitude, basically his point of view. but sometimes it's convincing enough it makes sense. i guess that's just him. being able to manipulate people, convince them of what to do. thus he'll make a good financial planner = his current job. a little bit of a salesman somewhat.

and that talk with him over cooking and eating dinner and washing up (i was doing all the cooking and washing up; and him the talking) he made me rethink about university. earlier in the day, i was thinking about culinary school. not just pastry.he was positive about that. and then he brought in my parents' view and university. and then about business school. no use he says. and it made sense. haha. in a way. ok, it coincided with ms ting's comments in class too - about people getting good grades then going into business (implied as if business isnt all that, which is somewhat true with almost everyone in business as if it's mainstream) so now i'm back to square one. seriously at loss at what i want to do in uni. something fun, adventurous, out of the classroom. national geographic! haha. that would lead me into geography, but i'm not into the science. just the outdoors. environment. making people recycle. making the world sustainable.

this always happens just because i'm so easily swayed. lets just hope that can change very soon.

perhaps it was the significance of having my last 17-year-old dinner, i was in a pretty good mood, cooking for me, my brother and my dad, washing up, all on my own accord. perhaps it was the atmosphere. happy day = i'm being a helpful person, and i got to talk to my brother in a long time - without parents around. so i guess it's a pretty reflective or...don't really have a word to describe it, but, calming, to have a talk with siblings. older siblings (no matter how self-centred and lazy they are - well, my brother was saying how we should all just have dishwashers so we don't have to wash dishes, while I was washing all the dishes and he was eating ice cream) and so my nicest dinner i've cooked myself:

Fried Rice with ham and celery, Portobello Mushroom with Butter and Garlic (my signature), and lastly Grilled French Onion Bratwhurst.