it just occurred to me that between the hiatus of 11 months on my blog, i missed out mentioning two very significant points in my life.

1. I'm in SMU(Singapore Management University)
2. I'm climbing.

why is it so important for me to declare these as part of me?
I do strongly believe that my time in SMU (not even a full year yet), has changed me in little ways, and will most probably affect most of my future life choices and directions. Also, they are right now, the loves of my life. especially climbing. just like gymnastics, I'll regret not ever being part of the sport.

Some (like my dad) ask, "what's so fun about climbing?" People may just think we climb up the wall full of tiles, come down, and go up again. If you think that's all to climbing, think again and read on.

We climb plastic holds on the wall, yes. But one needs to figure out where to put one's hands and legs, in what position, in what sequence? It's challenging having to figure out a puzzle before one pounces on the wall. And then there's the adrenaline rush when you're climbing. Can I reach for the next hold? Can I hold on to that shitty tile? If I put my leg there, can I jump for the tile? Can I finish the problem? And then you listen to your surroundings. Have you got people shouting and encouraging you from behind? Cheering you on. Going "awww" when you missed the tile and fell on to the soft mattress below. They feel your excitement for you, and you feel theirs, to carry on climbing. It's dependent on each other. Climbing is an individual sport? Don't ever say that again, because it's definitely a team sport, it's just up to you to decide how big you want your team to be. 

Ranting is apparently part of my nature. I need a place to just let out my thought, no matter how random they are. But as I am, I rarely will be able to commit myself to something for a long period of time, let alone on a regular basis. And thus, I'm back here, because I don't want to start a new page when I know i'll abandon it someday.

Today's rant is a self-reflection. On why am I'm so tired all the time.

The simplest reason being: I am too busy.

Why am I too busy? Because I take on too many things.

Why do I take on too many things? Because I am interested in these things and want to do them.

Why am I interested in so many things? Because they interest me.

.....

I think everyone who knows me, has heard about the number of commitments I have, and most likely I'm a limiting factor to the scheduling of many gatherings and meetings. I want to work, I have school, I want to play hockey, I want to continue with gymnastics(and perhaps hold on to a past that I gave up), I want to experience the world. I guess with so many commitments, it's unlikely that I'll ever commit my time fully and wholly to a certain project or commitment, which I find a saddening part of my life.