*gush*

and I saw hot mr. long haired dude again!

ending

Sometimes, ending exams can be so uneventful. the feeling of being lost, not having anything urgent to do, or a goal in mind. it's a little disorienting.

like how I feel when I'm usually super busy with commitments, having a lull period just throws me off.

summer 2012

I can't wait. 

It's distracting me so much so that I have got to let it out somewhere in attempt to get it off my mind. There's still two more papers to go (which I feel are relatively important for me to score well), but there's very little motivation to study for them now, since my motivation's being taken up by my excitement over upcoming plans for the next three weeks. Here's the plan, and ho, it's going to be packed!

Rinjani Trekking and Bali

25th May - night flight to Bali

27th May - start trekking Mt Rinjani

1st May - Bali explorations

3rd May - fly home

Melbourne

4th May - night flight

5th May - head for Grampians to join melly

6th May - drive back down to city

7th - 8th May - Great Ocean Road drive with hockers, and another side trip to Grampians

11th May - val's dance concert

13th May - Food hunt with Kaden&Jason

14th May - fly home!

it's so terribly exciting i can't wait!

love

if no one's giving you any love, give some love out yourself first.

Social Psychology - Chapter 10

When we were together, we never talked about love. I think we were almost afraid of it, because I know was then. afraid of committing, of throwing myself into a whole new relationship I didn't know would last (which I did anyway).

A textbook was the one that told me I had loved you. How pathetic am I. You shouldn't need a textbook to tell you that you are in love, no matter if it's passionate love or companionate love. One should be able to feel it, the tremendous and expendable, universal feeling of love.

But it's also the textbook that is giving me reasons to accept that it was the right choice to let you go then. That we aren't compatible, that our relationship will not last in the long run. It was the situation we created for ourselves that caused the feelings to surface. The overwhelming propinquity we had for a full year, I can only say that I'm sad that it ended together with the relationship.

Ironically, the textbook telling me all this, also belongs to you.

pre-exam rants

I think I started studying too early. Or at least I felt like it today. I'm afraid I'll finish studying days before the exam (which has never happened before, because I never finish studying before the exam), and forget all the content when it's crunch time. I've got about 9 days to my first paper. Doesn't seem like a lot of time, but, I'm getting bored of studying already! It's only Day 2 since I started my revision by the way. Fear of finishing my revision early? pfttt...what nonsense is this??

After dinner, I randomly picked out my favourite book, flipped to a random page, sat down and started reading. And reading. And reading. Over two hours flew past without me realizing it. That's the power of a good book.

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffeneger 

twenty first.

I just came back from an old friend's 21st birthday party, and the day's proceedings got me thinking about stuff, so I've got many things going through my head right now, most of them about my future.

The question has been popping up quite frequently: "What are you studying in university? What major of Social Sciences? What do you learn in Sociology?". Sometimes, I'm at loss for words. I'd wish I'd have googled it earlier. (Wiki: Sociology is the scientific study of society. A sociologist studies human societies and social behavior.) Other times, I can describe generally, that I study almost anything and everything about people and the world, basically, fluff. As to what (jobs) I can do, almost anything not specific is about it.

And then "Which JC did I come from? NJC?". And the response I'll get are those assuming I'm a) smart, b) stereotypical hardworking mugger and c) straight A student. Expectations. That's what people have of you when they find something out about you. Expectations create stereotypes. No. Scratch that. Stereotypes create expectations, and these expectations drive the person to achieve or prove something, sometimes only reinforcing the stereotypes. The never-ending cycle.

Which brings me somewhat to my future career. I think life is too short. I don't think there'll be enough time in life for me to achieve all that I want to do, like climb the Himalayas, travel the Silk Road on bike, visit the remote villages in the world, check out the Amazon rainforests before they die out...and the list goes on. I want my job to be able to allow me to accomplish these things, something flexible, that I can do at my own time. Like writing, or photography, or blogging. But I've clearly shown no apititude for any of these creative industries. And no self-discipline to make myself complete tasks on my own. I'll procrastinate forever till the end of time and nothing will get accomplished.

So the latest project I've got running in circles around my head: a backpacker's hostel with an integrated cafe/bakery. Combining my passion for travel and baking, isn't this an ideal solution?

glasses

I broke at least 5 already over the past week i think. wine glasses, beer glasses, water glasses. whenever I try to wash them in the sink, something cracks. I have avoided washing up since then. let's hope my boss doesn't see this :)

summer plans

if I don't get an internship this summer (*crosses fingers*), I'm going to try starting a business. (*cross my heart and swear on my KitchenAid mixer*)