wish time would just stop.
so i could actually have time to think
stupid indecisive me.but i can't help it ! it's gonna affect me for the next 4 years of my life.FREAKING HELL.people would say i've had more than enough time to think.since june?
argh.
my mom's so coming back in an hour or two and just demand the damned letter from me, fill it in and post it for me tmr.but why can't she just understand MY point of view.and now she's making me sway into thinking it might be better going to njc.after i decided not to go a few hours earlier.i'll feel freaking guilty for leaving the team if i go.but i'll regret not going as well.what the freaking damn hell is wrong with me?or issit just the mind-blowing decision.why must an inexperianced 14 year old girl make such a decision? but if i don't, my mom will make it for me and i'll most probably regret it like hell.starting a new isn't exactly a good thing for me.why must i be so resposible? its not like not being responsible will kill me right? but nooooooooo ...if i don't then everyone will kill me.because they all depend on me.like im some slave/maid rather than a leader.ass.can i just go to africa like now? or like fling myself out the window and see if i can fly.stupid block's roof is locked.like anyone would be so stupid to commit suicide off a 30-storey block.yea right.im going furthur and further off point.asssss.just ranting whatever comes to my mind..or fingertips.







megaaaa-cookie anyone?